As a full-time professional career coach, Miles Mather has helped hundreds of people get happier and make improvements to their careers over the past five years.
At certain times, everybody feels stuck and unhappy at work. They find themselves in a place where they are not enjoying their circumstances and yet are unclear how to move forward.
When people are stuck, it feels hard, and it can be like swimming through treacle. Miles revealed, “I’ve been here too; the dread at the end of a Sunday as Monday looms. The worries and anxiety of the work projects we must manage when we don’t really care enough about any of it!”
Life is too short for this to endure! Everyone needs work-life to be fun and rewarding.
The thing is, if individuals do not know themselves well enough to know their true career aims, it makes reaching a positive level of fulfillment almost impossible.
Miles explained, “We need to enjoy what we do and relate strongly to it. We want to have a good rapport with our bosses and the right support. Psychologically we need to feel capable, free to do our jobs our way and have great relationships at work. Also, we need to feel in touch with what we do. It has to matter to us if we are to thrive and succeed.”
It is not too much to ask – Everybody deserves this much!
If people can start by asking, ‘Why am I headed in this direction?’ and ‘Why do I care about it?’ this will help with self-awareness and focus.
To be clear, they need to be able to answer this question:
“Exactly where do I want to be headed, and why is this important to me personally?”
People don’t often ask themselves these types of questions; it feels somehow unnatural, selfish, or self-absorbed. Sadly, the right support is rarely made available in businesses to support personal reflection on people’s career directions. Likewise, the staff are rarely nurtured and given this type of attention or kindness by employers.
It’s not right that they feel unsure, lack clarity for where they are headed and don’t know how to move forward. If being self-centered means they really ‘get’ themselves, shouldn’t they be more self-centered and increase their self-awareness? After all, only this will improve their direction and situation if they have their attention on their path to take focused action to realize their goals.
Miles shared, “I have been well and truly stuck myself. I have felt the frustration, lack of motivation, and discomfort in my situation. I’ve brought this negativity and pressure back to the family home too!
This is not good.
After I had struggled for a long while in the wrong role, I called time. Finally, I decided I had enough. I wanted out and to find a direction I cared more about, a new way forward.
I thought it through. I designed a pathway and followed it. I have been fortunate enough to reach a personally exciting place now. As a career coach, my work is personally rewarding for me. My renewed direction ticks important boxes that I had never realized existed before my personal reflection.”
He continued, “Career focus starts with building awareness of your needs. I call this your WHY. It’s about our own will—personal ownership and connectedness to what matters to us, as the unique human we are.”
Purpose-led living is not a new concept by any stretch; life purpose and fulfillment reflection has been around since Socrates and Aristotle.
Miles shares his Why, What, How, Now coaching process:
MIles said, “Here is the rub. You cannot figure out what to do in your career and build a decent goal without knowing where you need to go; unless you know the personal basis to it!
Only when you have your WHY can you figure out ‘what’ you need for yourself. Then, the activity, context, and content of your career will fulfill and excite you for the long term.
Then you can create a meaningful long-term goal. This is the WHAT. Something that will stand the test of time and keep you motivated and energized when it gets hard. Where the aim keeps your attention, and you are fully committed to seeing it through; To work on it consistently!
Next, we get to the real challenge, as while great ideas come fairly easy, execution is hard.
I call this the HOW. Implementing the goal via a detailed step-by-step plan which addresses skills, knowledge, and the barriers between where you are and where you want to be —a plan that establishes how you will overcome every obstacle effectively.
Lastly, there is work on self-belief, personal accountability, and commitment to make it happen. Then, it is time for massive and proactive action. Real doing and progressing. This we call the NOW phase.”
To get unstuck
“To figure out where you want to go, build a plan and get 100% conviction, you can make it happen.”
Aristotelian Ethics tells people that to be at their best and to achieve self-realization, they need to go on a journey of discovery. Humans need ‘rational reflection’ to find their best selves. This reflection is linked to their need to discover a life goal, which meets their personal needs and leads them to greater happiness.
But what if they don’t start or can’t do this?
“It is a big risk not to make time and to delay focusing on your direction. I don’t use the word lightly, but Kant, Hegel, and Kierkegaard often refer to it as DESPAIR!” said Miles.
They all mention themes relating to;
A lack of clarity, direction, and self-awareness or ‘indeterminateness’; Not to accept oneself, not to understand oneself; Not to use awareness adequately to direct our path.
“Being stuck is hard and brings you down!
We need to prioritize ourselves and our personal needs; we cannot simply flow through life reactively without calling time and giving ourselves a better chance of being happier at work.”
There are four logical steps to this type of maturity and growth. First, it starts with developing self-awareness, then second, focus on self-management. Third, progress to better relationships and communication with others. The last step is to contribute meaningfully and in a way that sits authentically for everyone as an individual.
“My career breakthrough coaching course is so much fun. I am lucky to have found a way to contribute something that I find rewarding. I hope you have found your best direction and can enjoy work more every day. We all deserve to love what we do.” – Miles.
Miles runs his busy coaching practice from Farnham, Surrey, England.
Reach him through text 07973 490 471 or email firstname.lastname@example.org to learn about how to join his waiting list. And don’t forget to visit his website and follow his LinkedIn account to keep updated.
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